Tuesday, September 20, 2005

untitled

everything is finally working out for everyone
everyone is getting who they want and everything they want
i'm extremely happy for them because they all deserve it...
but I can't help but to wonder why it can't happen to me
****


You wanna hear something sad? Well, it really hurts when you think you find the one you love, the one for you. He is everything that you have dreamed of. It's not that he doesn't love you back, because he does. And the strong feelings connected between you two, even sometime you feel that it's impossible to happen. Sometime you just wanna let it go, let it slowly walking away from your mind, dream and life. But if you do the thing you know deep down is the right thing, you may miss out on the chance of being with possibly with your soul mate. This guy is so amazing. For the first time in your life, every time you even think about him, you fill up with this joy that you can't even explain. It feels so good, like you could jump up and touch the stars.

Every minutes of your life, never apart from his shadow. You might think that you're crazy and pathetic, but it's real. Too many hopes, dreams and plans that you think you could do with him in the future. You doesn't care even if it's only a day, a night or a minute with him, before he finally say good bye and leave you alone. Your friends and families might doubting the power of your dreams about him, but you just don't care. You have always heard that it should never matter what other people think, because love is love, and true love may only come once in your whole life.

To be honest, I just want to scream, I have not cried since.... well since something really bad happened that I don't want to talk about.... but now I feel like cryin. I just hate this so much. Realising that even you know it might never ever happen to you, you have no power what so ever to fight against it. So confused, don't know which one I should believe most. It's simple, about choices that you want to make for your life. You know, love doesn't always meant you belong to each other. So, is it the case, or just another issues that I have to testing my own feeling? I really don't have any idea to answer that.

Sometimes it's hard to face reality. You feel the greatest feeling every time you're with him. You can't sleep just because you'll see him tomorrow. Every time you're with him it's like a moment in heaven. But soon enough the magic disappears. Your heart is breaking and tears constantly come. Every beat of your hears hurts from all the pain. You wish you were hidden from all the world, then maybe all this pain would go away. But sometimes it's hard to face reality.
Cause LOVE..it's not always what it seems.
me at 11:18 PM
Thursday, September 08, 2005
so confuse
don't know what to do
don't have anybody to share
don't want anything to tell
just confuse and lonely
me at 7:44 PM
 
 




::ABOUT ME::



FeBy
Surabaya - Jakarta
Born on 80's

I'm just an ordinary girl who loves dreaming and creating my own unique world. Moody,selfish,and easygoing. Not following any rules, just my own.

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